The good, the bad, and the ugly in our infertility journey. After I got home from my beta yesterday I put 3 bottles of wine in the fridge just in case. At 330 I got a phone call from the clinic and instantly felt sick. I sent the call to voicemail and then listened to it after.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015. We had our anatomy scan - I am 21 weeks pregnant - today. We found out that we are having a baby boy, and even more importantly, everything looks normal and healthy. I think I was holding my breath through the entire scan, just waiting to make sure that everything was okay. I just feel so blessed. I keep reminding myself how .

A story of loss, life, and not understanding why. The system is a very broken thing. I knew the system was broken before we became foster parents. I was not prepared for how broken it actually is. I have a feeling I am going to be walking into an ambush and the kids will be removed from our home shortly. I have a very bad feeling. I never thought we were doing something wrong or starting trouble. The wellbeing of the children has been our priority since day one.

8220;So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. I work at a high-end preschool. For the most part the kids are great! How hard it was to have their kids full time.

It would have been really traumatic if that had happened at home, or in the car.

Working towards my forever family. Want to Keep Up With Me? This is a story. One filled with love, happiness, fears, hopes, tears, prayers and waiting. waiting for our happy ending. But mostly this is the collection of thoughts of a woman who seems to not be able to achieve the one thing that she thought would always come easily - motherhood. At the same time, she is trying to be a good stepmom and wife.