Have been crying on and off, holding on to Bunny and drinking tea. The world as I know it has changed forever. Today will be etched in my memory forever. Just the punitive parent i.

I visited my gynaecologist today. Fourteen! I was happy that she had become pregnant so easily. But I cried all the way.

Our intake appointment at the Second New Clinic is September 2nd, so just over two weeks away. I might actually start my period that day, but probably not since my periods have been getting shorter, which is apparently a sign of impending menopause.

The highs and lows of a child psychologist dealing with infertility. I feel paranoid, verging on the brink of sanity. I realise how dramatic this sounds. I am extremely in touch with reality and therefore unlikely to actually lose the plot, but I am definitively losing perspective. 1 I always thought my purpose here on earth was to be a mom. 3 I miscarried even with donor eggs. When will this end? July 21, 2015.

No One Knows What The Future Holds. Today is CD15 of my second round of Clomid. AF arrived when I was at work and it was all I could do to make it through the day without crying. I was home all of about 5 seconds before I burst into tears.

My last birth control pill today. Two years ago I was in the same spot- finishing up the last pack of pills, full of excitement for what the subsequent months would bring. Man, I had been good. In mind, I never missed a pill. Right on schedule, every day. I vowed to never again use them. Well even though my break.

A book and a blog for first-time mothers. This is the most likely comment that people will say to me in the next few weeks. Yes I want to finally see this baby.

Back In the Saddle! Back In the Saddle! January 3, 2017. I hope everyone finished out 2016 with a bang! Like clockwork, AF came on new years day so we counted yesterday as CD1. Hopefully we see nothing and can continue on to round 3. I hope everyone else is hanging in there! September 29, 2016.