Staying sober one day at a time. Got a new bike! The kids are really wanting me to take them for a ride. This is the best way ever to get to work. I need to go fast through turns. I hoping to be on the track by this time next year. I am learning how to forgive. Slow progress is better than standing still. Wow, what a crazy few months. They just wanted to hang out with their dad.

So I plan on going tomorrow.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014. Water the colour of well brewed tea,. Steep grassy banks, six feet high. Dark green grass, lush, long. It is always raining here. The clay soil is immune to the rain. The grass a rain coat. No matter how hard it rains. The clay is dense, oily. Some potter tried to dig some up. The clay grasped the tool. So tightly that the potter. Had to leave it behind.

It has been a long and hard road back to feeling like I can share my life and my story. I have been struggling to see the point, to have hope or to even think that someone, anyone is interested in hearing my voice. I miss her little fa.

Wake up to spiritual growth. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Poems prayers, and ponderings. What can I say? Reading this did get me thinking about how being the Hot Mess is related to white privilege.

Each day is a gift I was not expecting. As of right now, the cause of death is unknown. I have something in common with Amy Winehouse. That was my last drink. I hope I never forget it.