A couple of weeks ago my sweetest love Ahmed turned five. It was really exciting and emotional for me; amazingly the years flew fast and my baby is quickly growing into a gentleman - a naughty one! I celebrated my five years of motherhood by jamming my instagram feed with the photos following from the past five years, lots of them was too difficult to choose and I expressed my unlimited and unconditional love to him so honestly 3.

British book lover and regular concert goer. After over an hour, it was time for my cohort to g.

There is a club that dreads a new member, I joined a decade ago. I sank to my knees and wailed. The last ten years have been a lesson in living, first I had to learn to live at all, to stop hiding under the duvet, to see through the fog of shock and denial, to walk one step in front of another and to battle the random panic attacks to get my girl to school. Can I say for the record how tired I am, how horrified and sad and drained and wishing life was kinder? .